Tonight, we’re doing things a little differently with Saturday Night Confessions. This is where I share some odd, slightly embarrassing, and hopefully relatable quirks. So grab your tea (or maybe something stronger—it is Saturday night, after all), and settle in. Because tonight, I’ve got a confession that’s a bit weird, a little wonderful, and, I think, very relatable.

So here’s the thing…I’m obsessed with watching cleaning videos. Not just mildly interested—I mean full-blown, can’t-look-away obsessed. I could easily lose hours scrolling through YouTube, TikTok, or Instagram, watching people transform disaster zones into spotless sanctuaries. There’s just something mesmerizing about the squeaky-clean surfaces, and the neatly organized pantries (let’s take a moment to admire those perfectly aligned spice jars). Don’t even get me started on the restocking videos. Those are the absolute best. It’s like ASMR for my soul—this rhythmic calm that just washes over me.
Here’s the twist, though: I don’t actually like cleaning. At all. I despise it. I’d rather be doing anything else. And when I finally do get around to it, I’ll start… and then stop halfway through to check my phone, or remember something else I “need” to do. Cleaning just bores me out of my mind.
I know it sounds ridiculous, right? I’m drawn to the idea of a perfectly organized, sparkly home. But the reality of cleaning? My personal nightmare.

And before you start giving me tips, trust me—I’ve tried them all. Oh, I’ve bought the fancy products, the miracle sprays, the scrubbers, the caddies, all the things that cleaning influencers swear will change your life. My cleaning arsenal is packed with Scrub Daddies, Grove Collaborative products, and a bunch of other tools I was convinced would make me love cleaning. But you know what? It never lasts. The first few days, I’m all in. And then? That enthusiasm just fizzles out, and I’m right back to my old, messy habits.
Maybe it’s because I don’t find cleaning all that rewarding. I’d much rather be curled up with a good book, writing, or doing literally anything else. It also doesn’t help that my ADHD meds have usually worn off by the time “chore time” rolls around, so my attention span for cleaning? Basically zero.

I’ve honestly always been like this. Going way back—picture this: it’s 20 years ago, and I’m living with my then-boyfriend in this little mill house outside of Charlotte. Now, he and I didn’t have much; we were in our early 20s, he was working in food service, I was in retail management, and we were just getting by. One summer, we were in a pretty nasty car accident. A car plowed into us from behind at 45 miles per hour, totally wrecking our car. Thankfully, we were okay, and we eventually got a decent settlement from it.
That fall, we decided to take a trip to Pigeon Forge. My mom agreed to come by to check on our cat while we were away. Now, knowing my mom would be visiting, I went into overdrive—I cleaned our house from top to bottom. Mainly because I didn’t want her to see how we usually lived. When we got back, she told me something hilarious: she’d come over with a friend, but told her to wait in the car, because, and I quote, “Ashley isn’t much of a housekeeper.” She didn’t even think my place would be presentable! When she walked in and saw how clean it was, she went back out to get her friend so she could give her a “tour” of my surprisingly clean house. Even my mom didn’t believe I’d have a clean home without an occasion.

So maybe it’s time I just accept it: I’m not a natural-born cleaner. Maybe the dream of a spotless home is just that—a dream. I mean, life’s too short to spend scrubbing toilets, right? Maybe outsourcing is the answer…or maybe I’ll just keep enjoying my cleaning videos and call it a day.

Thanks for joining me tonight for Saturday Night Confessions. Remember, if you have a weird little habit or quirk, you’re definitely not alone. Let’s all embrace our quirks together. So until next week, stay weird, keep cleaning—or, let’s be real, just watch other people do it.